i hate having these relapses of being sad.
it doesnt help that i seek information out.

is it me, or are people everywhere just taking what they can get. having something for the sake of having it.

we just got back from ellijay and i really love my mom. we went tubing and i saw a huge spider. patrick and scott also saw a rope snake.



the invitations are done. many long hours were spent making them but i am proud of the outcome.

i hate the word wifey. does anyone else. its fucking stupid. i always hate it when people say that.

ro is out of town and i miss her.
i miss all of the girl time at 198 but its just too hot for me to be there.
i dont want friendships to slip away from me. i still care about everyone the same.

i am so excited to move. its up in the air as to who our fourth roommate is going to be, but it will all fall into place in the next two weeks. matt and i are painting tomorrow.

i dont know if spencer reads this, he probably doesnt, but why the fuck can i not go a day without thinking about him. he seems to always have to have a girl. it makes me feel like i was just filler. everything we had just slipped his mind. he has dated so many people since me, i cant believe it. i feel like he has changed a lot, or maybe it is me that has. i just get sad thinking about him with other people. doing the same things. saying the same things. new inside jokes. away messages to girls. and one i thought he didnt like. oh well. one of these days i will find someone who will make me happy. someone who will want to be with me. someone who wont leave me when times get tough. someone i can depend on but still be independent.

fin.